大笨蛋

I AM FREAKING EMO-ING...

Thursday 27th dec.
Prepare and finally done with ur present. Laminated the portrait of you I drew.
Went out at 845pm.
reached compasspoint at around 945pm.
Sms-ed you at 1025pm and you are still out.
Bought a Oreo Cheesecake..
Tried walking to your house. but I'm lost. took lrt back to sengkang, den transferred to the one to your house.

Reached at around 1115pm.
12am. Msged and wished you happy birthday
1am, you are not back yet
almost 2am. and you are finally back.

haha. Imagine me sitting at the playground from 1130pm to 2am..
looking over to the cars that drive in every now and then to check whether if it is you coming back.
Fearing that I will see someone drive you back and my heart will break.
Singing all the songs I wanted to sing for you, but alone at the playground.
Waiting anxiously for your return as it is late and not safe in your area.

Anyway, put the present outside your door, and opps, you saw me and I finally see you.
But it's not a very good thing.

You read the letters I've wrote
You said you were moved by wat I wrote
But that doesnt changed the fact that we are not together.
You said Chant for watever I want but dont have to chant for you to be with me together.
You said maybe you werent meant for me.
Yup, like you said, at least we grew together..

Your words mean so much and at the same time my heart breaks even more.
Though I dun pinned too much hope, but still, the broken heart, once again, into pieces.

I walked aimlessly, from Fernvale LRT station, to Compassvale Station. Practically it's from 1 end to another end. 45 to 50 mins of walk. With each passing steps, I walked with heavy footsteps. A stone seemed to be blocking my heartbeat. And I seemed to left something behind.
Ah ya.. My heart is still left with you.

I was as always, this stupid. waiting for you for hours this time, reminds me of that time I waited for you under your previous home to be able to go up your house, for pratically 3-4hours as you have not woke up.
Why do I always wait? Cos I think the waiting is worthwhile.
But people would think I'm too free. wait for hours doing nothing.

All this 20years, I've been waiting.
Be it waiting for you, the person I admire during secondary.
I have always be the one waiting.
I dont grumble cos I'm a guy and I should wait.
Wait for the right one. wait for the time tat it's my turn to love.

Am I foolish or wat to still wait and hold on to some hope that you will be back with me?
I think I am.
This very moment I feels like
BANGING MY HEAD into the WALL.
THROW STUFFs and make a MESS.
A CAR TO BANG ME and make me lost my memories of you.
SHOUT OUT LOUD.
A SHOULDER FOR ME TO CRY ON.
A HUG that keep me comfort for at least a while. give me one if you see me EMO
no need for a listening ears, cos words cant express wat I wanna say.

JUNWEI IS EMO.
Lol.. oh well. this dont last long..
大笨蛋

haiz
Reached near TPE, den I took a cab back. it's super expensive taking a cab now. $10.20 from the express way of sengkang to my house. And I sit in the cab for less than 10min. The uncle still use phone while driving. Keep on the sign left/right every 10sec. Almost wanted to scold him as I'm in the lowest of the 10World - HELL. I wonder If he's drunk or wat..BOYCOTT cab..

ARGHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tears seems to be in the eye. but it cant get out.